5 Ways To Own Your Confidence

@tarmarz-Tar-Mar-Tar-Marz-tarmarz.com-black-tee-missguided-leather- IMG_0047-(23)dwTop, Bralette, JeansMissguided

So I’ve wanted to do more personal blogposts, for a really long time, but for some reason never seemed to ‘have the time’. Posts with a little more substance should I say.. Well those excuses stop right here, so get ready for a chatty post every other week! During my time blogging over the last five years I’ve learned to be fully confident within myself & what I’m capable of. I’m standing here in my bra, I think that says a lot. I thought I would share the tips (big & little) I’ve learned along the way to boost your confidence!


1. It’s an oldie but a goodie but the saying ‘fake it ’til you make it’ was one of the earliest tips that I really took to heart. I think I had gotten myself into some unnerving situation (can’t remember for the life of me) and I literally had to decide to flip that switch & turn into a different person that I believed exuded confidence. When you take the leap in a situation like that, you do it again and again until you realise ‘hey, thats me doing that!’. My biggest fear all through school was public speaking or anything drama-related and coming from that to filming scripted promo-reels with strangers & talking on panels in front of hundreds of people just goes to show how far it can get you!

2. Embarrassment. The confidence plague of most Irish women… My mum (who was a very fashion-forward woman in the height of the madonna era) always used to tell me it’s better to stand out then to blend in like everybody else. After a long awkward pre-teen period I really absorbed this when I was around sixteen, and started messing around with blogging. For the first two years my closest friends (all guys) would constantly just take the piss out of me and everyone else was probably doing it behind my back. However I knew I was getting somewhere with this and just joked along not taking myself too seriously, which is all you can do really! Eventually my little successes spoke for themselves and now people really respect what I do and are really proud that I had the balls to put myself out there. Life is really too short to have that ‘ah sure no I couldn’t do that/wear that/get that’ attitude. If you believe in yourself eventually others will too, and you’ll be the one better off!

3. Believe it or not, 90% of women feel more confident after spraying themselves in perfume before heading out. I think thats a fantastic excuse to hit the Chanel counter!

4. Surround yourself with like-minded people. What’s your passion? Join a new club, connect with an instagrammer, add yourself to a facebook group & connect with others that share the same interests as you. None of my original friend group back home to this day have any interest in the digital industry so reaching out and meeting people in my field was so amazing and I’ve made so many great friends through it. It’s really soul-fulfilling when you can talk about your passions with people that ‘get-it’ and these are more then likely people that will boost your confidence and you’ll do the same for them!

5. Don’t let your failures knock you down. As an influencer for example it’s easy to compare yourself to other people in the industry. Sometimes they get amazing opportunities and it’s easy to wonder why ‘you weren’t picked/good enough’. Stop! Theres absolutely no point in getting hung up on stuff like this, be happy for your peers & take solace in the fact that if you keep grinding a new opportunity will be waiting for you. Every good opportunity isn’t the right opportunity, so relax & know what’s meant to come your way will in time.

I hope you liked our little chat about confidence. I’d love to hear your thoughts & tips in the comments below. Also let me know what other topics you would like me to cover on here on Tar Mar! I will see you on Thursday in my new style story. T.

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  • Trudy Johanna

    not only is this outfit lovely and you look amazing, all the points you made are excellent and offer good advice! x
    Trudy | TrudyJohanna

    • TarMarz

      Thanks so much for your feedback Trudy! X

  • Britney Lumbard

    Although I have heard these tips before, it’s nice to be reminded.

    • TarMarz

      For sure, I guess the classic truly do work x

  • Love this post! As women we have periods of struggling with confidence even for the seemingly most confident woman out there. This post will definitely help me in those shaky confidence moments so thank you! Love the top and bralett btw xx

    • TarMarz

      We definitely all have shaky moments but it’s good not the belt them take over and get in the way of your goals! Thanks for commenting x

  • This post was so nice to hear, especially loved the bit about the fear of failing/not being as good as others! Thanks for the lovely advice 🙂 x

    • TarMarz

      Ash glad you took something from it Daria!