Luxury Confessions

 Sac De Jour Bag – Saint Laurent // Ankle Boots – Carritz // Mini Drew Bag – Chloé // Adriana Sneakers – Acne Studios // Sunglasses – Céline

Ok, so I’ve got a sort of weird confession to make. I have the designer purchase FEAR. It’s no secret that a lot of the blogging community (including myself) have gotten a little obsessed with designer purchases. For some it’s a materialistic projection of our supposed success as bloggers, for others they simple just love to make investments in beautiful things, it could even be a little bit of both…

Two years ago I purchased my little Chanel ‘wallet on chain’ after a holiday from hell & took solace in the fact that I saved a couple of hundred euro buying it abroad. I love the thing, it’s been in more outfit posts then I care to admit, constantly gets compliments & it’s battered after almost daily use. Since then I haven’t really felt the need to buy anything else, because quite frankly I spent my money on the boring everyday necessities like rent & getting myself through university. I was born with too much sense for one person, since I was a kid I would constantly weigh up action vs consequence and even though I don’t regret the way I am it did hold me back from a lot of those wild teenage moments which always kind of annoyed me a bit. My first thought on pay day is usually how many months of rent can I pay in advance rather then ‘I can go on holiday now’ or ‘I can buy that designer bag I’ve always wanted’. Obviously it’s a responsible trait & at 23 I’m proud to say it’s the kind of trait that’s pushed me to be financially independent for the last few years. However working in a heavily materialistic industry you do feel the pressure of those luxury purchases… I find it difficult to bite the bullet on my dream purchases and to be honest when I imagine myself purchasing something ludicrously expensive, I get a overwhelming feeling of guilt rather then the happiness & excitement one should feel when reaching such a materialistic feat. I guess in a way I’m happy that my hapiness is not measured by how many nice things I can buy, but sometimes I wish I could just let go & enjoy myself a little more. Which is why I’ve decided that since I’m gone all ‘independent-woman’ for the year (sorry Cathal) I’m forcing myself to be selfish and spoil myself this year in the hopes I can find some balance within my feelings. Apart from all this luxury-related nonsense talk, I really do want to put myself first this year (which I find really difficult) and just revel in all the things I really want to do on my own. I want a self-indulgent year I think, mind, body, soul & Chanel!

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  • It’s funny reading this because the whole time I am screaming inside “JUST GO OUT AND TREAT YOURSELF!” I do really wish I had the same adult-ness you had to be sensible with my money and to not blow it on whatever is on my mind that month, but at the same time – when you work hard, I believe you should never feel guilt for buying something – just for you.

    You in particular are one of the hardest working people I know. You graft and you make it work and you will always be successful because of your incredible attitude towards life. You just moved to NYC, by yourself, and left your boyfriend back in Ireland to make your dream come true. That is bravery. That is courage. That is so damn inspiring. And you should buy yourself something special to mark such a huge point in your life.

    Yes, luxury goods are totally materialistic. 100%. But we are humans, and we like to peacock. Especially in the industry we are in. But you’re not one of those girls who gets everything handed to you, you work hard, and you should give yourself some slack.

    On another note – I’m going to be in NYC around the end of April / early June and I would love to come see you!


    • TarMarz

      Omg Anouska that comment actually made me cry a little! So nice you took the time out to write it! I’m definitely gonna bite the bullet this month but just so easily fall into the ‘ugh I’ll just pay rent instead’ mood.. Hurry up & come shopping with me in NYCcccccc x

  • I often feel the same. I am so sensible with money, to a fault almost – as I always feel guilty for buying even the smallest of treats! A big purchase has to be planned for me, or I would feel so stressed for ‘wasting’ money.

    Rachel |

  • Nicole O’mahony

    Don’t feel bad. You definitely deserve one of these beauties, especially after that amazing collection you produced! I saw that you’re selling some of it on Depop, I was just wondering is the pink coat that you designed is ever gonna be reproduced for people to buy? I am literally dreaming about owning a coat like that <3

  • I totally understand what you are saying! It would be great to spend money without feeling guilty or, should i have saved that for an emergency? I think when you do have that independence thing, you need to relearn enjoying spending money! It can take me up to a week to spend money on something sometimes. So im trying to follow what my uncle says “You cant take it with you so you might as well enjoy it while you’ve got it” which I think is kinda true!

    Hayley xx